The Travesty Known as Tim Tebow

I’m appalled that I’m even writing about Tim Tebow. However, based on the turnout at his August 30th workout at USC and his subsequent signing by the Mets, there seems to be a bull market right now for ballplayers who stink.

I can honestly say that if I were in the front office of an MLB franchise, then I wouldn’t have wasted the resources sending any of our scouts to witness this train wreck in Cali.

Like, really — if the dude can’t even throw a football with much steam, then why on earth would I believe that things are gonna be any different when he’s chucking a baseball?

I’m much more bothered by the fact that pro scouts gave Tim Tebow a tryout than I’ll ever be irked by The Steroid Era.

Ordinarily, I ignore any news involving Tim Tebow. But, after seeing this travesty unfold in enough YouTube and Vine videos, I’m compelled to release my own “20-80” scouting report if only to distance myself far away from the talent evaluators who’ve suddenly lost their sanity.

Hitting: 30

Poor mechanics despite keeping his head in during the swing. Back shoulder is dipped from the outset of his stance, resulting in an exaggerated uppercut swinging plane that renders him a pop-up waiting to happen. Displays a decent batting eye, but consistently makes contact with the edge of his bat instead of the sweet spot. Doesn’t hit the ball where it’s pitched. A sucker for pitches high and away. Has below-average bat speed.

Power: 25

Seems to be swinging as hard as he can, which translates into poor power transfer. Holds the bat in his palms instead of his fingertips, has minimal hip rotation, and fails to follow through completely on his swing – all of which severely limit his power-hitting potential.

Running: 55

Has good 6.76 speed in the 60-yard dash. Would post faster times if not for poor technique. Swings arms to the side, increasing air drag that slows him down while sprinting. Could benefit tremendously from working with a track coach.

Fielding: 30

Demonstrates ability to field cleanly, but doesn’t charge the ball. Seems lost when tracking fly balls. Displays poor habit of catching the ball in the palm of his glove instead of the webbing. Catches the ball with elbows against his body instead of arms extended to enable efficient glove-to-hand transfer.

Arm: 30

Awful arm and velocity. Fails to wind up properly and doesn’t generate any momentum with his crow hop due to inadequate hip rotation. Throws are consistently off-target with a poor flight path and the ball floats when released. Bounces throws even from close range in the outfield. Would be a severe defensive liability because baserunners would challenge him and succeed most (if not all) of the time.

Overall: 35

If you’re in desperate need of a pinch runner and are hard-pressed to make money from jersey sales, then he might be worth a late-season call-up to the 40-man roster. Otherwise, he has no future as a major leaguer and will even be overwhelmed by the worst that minor league pitching has to offer.

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