In honor of the Preakness Stakes running today, here’s a look at the Houston Astros season so far.

The Astros have nothing in common with the entrants in Baltimore. They are slowwwwwww. Who’s leading off? It doesn’t matter because no one is young enough, fast enough, or on base enough to steal a bag. They have 16 all told in 42 games. That means they are on pace to swipe 61 bags. Just because that’s how many the Tigers stole last year doesn’t mean that’s any kind of way to build a lineup. 

If Yordan Alvarez gets traded, it’s all over for the ‘Stros until their numerous newbies can develop. He could win the Triple Crown if someone can just get on. With Carlos Correa out, Jose Altuve is leading off. He’s still good, but he’s too old to give them what they need in that spot. Alvarez leads the team in all major offensive categories. Christian Walker offers solid protection. Isaac Paredes at third base gives them similar stats (.238 career hitter with 30 home-run power. Catcher Isaac Paredes (.276 career ave., good for 20 HRs)and Christian Vázquez might be the best catcher tandem in the league. 

Beyond that, the noobs in the outfield did not produce last year. Can Smith, Brice Matthews,  and Taylor Trammel are among nine outfielders who have seen the field. All but one has less than a year of experience. 

On the mound.  Hold on. Complaint time. Hey, MLB! When someone looks up ERA on one of your team’s websites, more than four pitchers should appear. This is a common problem for all kinds of stats. Houston’s site is particularly egregious in that only Mike Burrows and his 5.04 ERA. appear. It’s 2026 for crying out loud. 

On the mound…how do I say this nicely…oooof! Lance McCullers looked to be the ace of the staff, but has been wretched (6.86 ERA). Same with A.J. Blubaugh and Brian Abreu, who’s been even worse. Instead, Spencer Arrighetti has been the man (5-1, 1.50). Peter Lambert has been way better (2.76 ERA) than previous results would have indicated. The rest of the staff has been terrible, except reliever Kai-Wei Teng. The Astros are first in walks allowed, second in homers allowed and hit-batsmen, last in ERA. 

This team should t be good, but they shouldn’t be this bad, either. The weird thing is: they’re ten games below .500, but they’re only six games out of first. 

Forecast: They can catch Sacramento, but should fall short of the playoffs. 76