An Immodest Proposal: A Special Session of Baseball Season
Doesn’t the World Series seem like an eternity ago?
Seven games? Cleveland’s heroic comeback? That spectacular, thrilling ending? The Cubs winning the whole thing for the first time in 108 years?
Don’t look now but that happened this month. Less than a week later, the presidential election took place and the whole country’s mood changed. Instead of feel-good stories about baseball and lifetime fans and redemption, we’re bombarded with stories about the guy who won the electoral vote but not the popular.
I’ve decided that I’m not going to refer to that guy directly. The guy who calls everyone a liar, but who actually lies so often himself that people can’t keep up with him. This guy. This is not my kind of guy.
Yeah, the last three-plus weeks have been like a bad dream. The hate, the crimes, the angry mobs, the late-night tweets.
So, baseball! Your country needs you. Bring back the fun. Spare us from the boredom of the NFL. I’m proposing an emergency session of baseball season. Starts next week.
How about it? A six-week major league season, played only indoors. Each team would play only three games a week. We’ll play the whole thing in Toronto, Tampa, Miami, Milwaukee, Houston and Phoenix. All games will be on TV and we’ll play a best of three mini-World Series to decide the Champion of the Special Session.
No hot stove this year … just real big-league hardball. America needs you.
Send up a bat signal … or a ball signal. Some kind of signal to baseball that we need it. We promise not to do this every year. We won’t abuse the special session. We’ll reserve it only for the worst of times.
And believe me, this is the world of times.